Earlier today I found myself scrubbing a toilet used by four boys as the Eagles hit Life In The Fast lane came streaming in from the kitchen radio. At that exact moment I was running through the weeks tasks, one of which was the upcoming plans for Mothers Day.
How ironic that I was the one up to my elbows in, well I am not going to mention it here. But just trust me it wasn’t pretty. But seriously I am the one in the thick of mothering, and I am trying to plan out how to fit in all the things we have obligated ourselves to doing for our mothers. This while they sit happily in semi retirement wondering what time I will be arriving bearing gifts, neatly pressed grandchildren, and my husbands handyman services.
Don’t get me wrong I appreciate all that they have done. I beleive I have been expressing this for 30 years now. I don’t mind doing things for them, and of course I want to honor them. But for pete sakes at what point is it my Mothers Day?
I do not enjoy a husband that feels that it is his duty to accommodate me on Mothers Day, as I am not his mother. My kids are small, and while I love their home made gifts. The cereal in bed I have come to cherish over the last few years I wouldn’t trade for the world. That being said however I must state that it seems no one is going to suddenly say ” happy mothers day Jenna, what is it that you would like to do today?” or ” gee how could we help you feel relaxed and loved today?” It seems that the only one that is going to be doing that is me!
And what the heck is wrong with that any way? Why can’t we say” I love and honor you” to our moms with a card and maybe a small gift, then take the darn day to ourselves . And why can’t our moms see this as well? Surely they were plagued with the same ill fate of being everything for everyone while sacrificing their own happiness.
I am not saying you should be selfish here but what is the point of the day if we don’t get to honor ourselves as moms if no one else is going to? I feel part of honoring yourself is giving place to your needs. So if a walk on the beach is what brings you peace than you should be able to do it and enjoy it. I feel like I am not able to enjoy this day that is suppose to be for recharging and honoring my efforts as a mother.
This mothers day I am making a declaration to honor our mothers with a card, a call, maybe even flowers. I will send them all the love and light I can each time I think of them on this day, and then I plan on doing as Liz Guilbert in Eat Pray Love advises, and dropping it. What I mean by this not that Iam not honoring them, rather I am going to give them their place and then unapologetically honor myself as a mother as well.
I am all for showing love, respect, and honor to the women in our lives that have raised us, been there for us, and still remain in our hearts. These moms deserve their praise. We deserve ours as well. You only live once and if no one is going to do it for you than honey you are going to have to do it for yourself. It may be planting your garden, or reading your book on the porch, a long run, a hot bath, or a fishing trip with the very boys that did such unspeakable things to your toilet just days before.
What ever it is that recharges you, please please please just to it this Mothers Day. Do it for me, do it for yourself, do it for the mother it will make you be on Monday. And for goodness sakes do it with out apology, with out shame, and like no one is watching. After all you are living life in the fast lane right now. The pee covered, matted, brightly colored, messy, fast lane and it isn’t slowing down any time soon. So what better time moms!
From the bottom part of my heart to yours…..Happy Mothers Day Moms! Enjoy it! Really ENJOY it!